Divorce Paralegals came to my rescue when I almost gave up!

Let’s suppose, you are holding on to a rope very tightly while the thing on the other side is pulling forcefully as well. Your hand is getting bruised and excruciating pain is engulfing your mind like forest-fire on a dry autumn day. Suddenly you decide to let go of the rope and almost immediately as it is out of your hand, the pain slowly recedes. This is why I think sometimes letting go is more prudent than holding on to something. The immediate pain can be devastating but at least you get another chance for the future. Maybe divorce can also be explained in this way. And today when I saw someone saw posting about divorce paralegals in one of the social media pages, it all became like a trip down old memories for me. So I decided to write this, like a memoir or just like a mere monologue in a written format you can say, but I will try to trace every emotional note that I made while I was going through with my divorce and how the paralegals came to rescue when I almost gave up. This is definitely written for my daughter Tracy, I don’t even want to imagine her going through all that I have been into, but I just want her to know that giving up is not the option but letting go is.

Even The Smallest Of Incidents Reminds Me Of The Horrid Past...!

Tracy has always been quite feisty even when she was just a little child. She is a bit clumsy too, so even after fifteen years of her life; she still occasionally knocks down flower vases or things like that. Unintentionally of course, but she immediately says sorry with an utmost innocent face that can perhaps melt rocks even. 

I was in the kitchen when I immediately heard the sound of something breaking really hard on the ground. Although there was no one in the house except me and Tracy but suddenly I was panic-stricken. I rushed to the living room through the corridor and I could see James standing there with a horrible face, deep red like a fuming cauldron. Cursing everyone in my family, he grabbed another vase and banged it on to the wall. It broke into several pieces as I stood there motionless. Now, he came towards me, his hands trembling in anger, I was still motionless but I could understand he is about to do something terrible, before closing my eyes, I could see a strong fist was moving towards me quite fast...

“Mamma, Mamma, are you okay? I was standing there motionless, Tracy was holding me, shaking me to bring back my consciousness, nobody hit me, everything was gone as I opened my eyes, and it’s just a past. I looked down; a piece of the broken vase was there close to my feet. I picked it up and wondered; even this little piece can do so much to me...

When Locked Doors Were A Common Thing For Me...

The main problem James had was insecurity and this was the base of every action he took against me. As I woke up one morning, I thought it was doomsday; there was no light in the room and I felt suffocated. It was morning but James had shut all the shades which later became bolted against the windows, so that I can never open them. Those windows seemed to speak to me, as if it’s my own mind was shutting down slowly. I reached the door and found it was locked. I screamed, banged it and cursed him but nothing happened. James was clever, he would not leave any cell or any modes of communication for me call anyone. He even sent Tracy to her Grandma’s which in a way, was the only right thing he did unknowingly. To secure my captivity, he actually freed my daughter from this horrible situation.

I cursed him again and screamed to open the door. But no answer was there. Suddenly, I heard another voice, of a man, I couldn’t recognize it, and then I heard another voice, this time a woman. I frantically banged the door but no one came to help me, they just continued to laugh and talk. Soon I heard the voice of Mick Jagger, James just put on a Rolling Stones record, it was getting louder and louder. I got his idea; he just suppressed my voice so that no one can hear me scream. And this became a daily thing till afternoon. Then with a sudden click he would open the door and hold my throat. His threats and curses were useless, I was already broken inside. He would let me do every other work in the household after he left in the evening. But he made sure that the door was locked from the outside. I was so weak, I didn’t even bother to tell this to anybody, it was not because of his threats, it was just me holding to that rope that was bruising my hands every day. 

“Nothing’s Ever locked...”

Every morning I would wake up to the sound of music but inside I was living in hell. I would wake up late and would listen to heavy metal as James and his friends would do the same things every day. I can’t imagine where he got the money, probably some gambler friends or I don’t know. I looked at the closed window and as if dreamingly I could hear the horn of a white Chevy. James always had great taste and a far-away look in his eyes and needless to say, I was irrevocably in love with him. We would drive the city at night and every afternoon when I would hear that familiar horn I would look out of the window and see him waving at me as if he would take me to a far away land.

I still remember the day when we first kissed each other in front of his aunt’s house. I badly wanted him, my eyes always betrayed me and he could read them so well. He wanted that too so he took me out of the car. “But James, your Aunt’s can come anytime, what’ll happen then?”

“Relax, they are out of town till next week, it’s just you and Me.”, he smiled wistfully.

“But the door is locked, how can we get in??” I was puzzled.

“Nothing’s ever locked sweetheart”, He was no crook but he always had his own means of getting things. He grabbed a bunch of keys and a hook which he called as the key to every locked door. I don’t know from where he got it. But he learned it well and with just few clicks he opened the door. I was least bothered about his habits then and so I grabbed his shirt and pulled him to the couch. This time I locked the door and made sure he can’t run from me. 

Suddenly James opened the door and threw a bunch of magazines at my face. I couldn’t response; I was too weak for it. Even with the loud metal playing behind I heard him say,


“Cancel your  bloody subscriptions to these magazines or otherwise next time I will shove them inside your mouth! With a loud bang he locked the door again.

I wasn’t really thinking about reading them but since I had nothing to do till afternoon, I started leafing through them with my bedside lamp. And it is there where I stumbled upon an advertisement of the divorce paralegals. Thanks to the magazine I came to know that there are people who can actually help you file your divorce even if you can’t follow the process by yourself. I didn’t actually thought of divorce by then but this seemed like an escape route from this hell. I needed to know more about it but first I had to leave this house. I knew I had some friends I could count on but till now I never felt the courage. But how can I leave the house? How can I unlock the door? And then suddenly I remember what James said, “Nothing’s ever locked sweetheart...”

So as soon as James left from the house I frantically started searching as I knew he still had that key set somewhere. And I was right; I finally found it in the attic. I closed my eyes and tried to remember how he used to do it. This tool can open locked doors from outside but can it open it from the inside? I had nothing to lose, so I trusted my gut and started my trial. To my utter surprise I managed to do it and as soon as it opened I started running, I was breathing fast but I was running as fast as I can. My arms, legs, my whole body was aching but still I ran. The pain was receding, I had let go of the rope that was bruising me.

The Divorce Paralegals Came To My Rescue: 

Rachel had always been my 2. A.M friend so when she came to know all of this, she was proud and furious at me at the same time. But without any delay she helped me reach out to getitdonewithoutlawyers.com where I came to know all about divorce paralegals and how things worked. I told them everything about my horrible experience to Tracy’s existence and this helped them file the case accordingly so that I can get the divorce without the least trouble. While they handled everything from the paper-works to proceeding, Rachel helped me reconnect with my lost life again by bringing Tracy to me. I don’t know how much she understood then but she was my emotional anchor that time and that never changed ever since.

All That Remains...

As me and Tracy cleaned up the broken pieces of the vase, I understood that getting the divorce was not just important for my own life but it was the best decision I ever made for her as well. After getting the divorce it was hard for her to reconcile everything smoothly. But she’s smart and she knows what’s already broken from inside should be discarded instead of a futile try to glue it back together. Although it’s written for her but I still posted it here for all the Tracys out there and also Mirandas like me who are still holding to a rope that’s bruising their hands.

After finishing the work Tracy took a deep breath and said, “Phew! That’s an awful lot of work we did momma, why don’t we chill out on the porch with some ice-cream, what say, Vanilla or Chocolate?”

“Whatever you’ll have my love...” With a joyous smile she began to dance and tossed one of my Bonsai pots to the ground. She smiled with that pretty face and said, “Sorry...!”

The broken pieces of the Bonsai pot were scattered all around the floor. I picked up one piece and thought, “Well, not all broken pieces bring tears to your eyes, some of them can make you smile as well. I looked at Tracy, she was waving her hand and dancing to a tune on the radio. She pulled my arm to join her and really, I couldn’t be happier!